Best Update Blog Ever
December 3, 2021

Can't believe it's been a week since I updated. So, here's what I've been up to:

Wednesday (before Thanksgiving): Woke up, packed, *sigh*ed at the rain, and drove south. What wire is loose in my loom that makes me depressed when it's cloudy for one of the five days per year here? I mean seriously. The bar up the hill will give everybody that walks in it's doors one free drink any day that the sun never shines. The last time they had to do it was early December, 2006. No joke. They may have had to give away teh booze on the day before Thanksgiving too. Could you imagine?

"Honey, the honeybaked ham will be ready in twenty minutes and my father will be here anytime."

"Gotta go to the backstop honey, they're giving it away up there!"

So, it's the one gloomy day of the year and naturally that makes me feel gloomy. It kinda woulda been nice to make a fire and brew a pot of my favorite French Roast/Hazlenut Cream (thanks Lars) blend of coffee. Instead I drove to LA, with a stop at Fish's place to swap glasses back, and hung out with the fam. Poker Videos

Almost immediately upon arrival I have this interaction with my little brother. He just turned 18 and the entire family is feeling old as a result. We're all sitting on the couch and he asks if I want to read his paper. I say, "Sure, da me lo."

"Isn't it 'lo me da'?"

"Ummm, no, I'm pretty sure that it's 'da me lo'."

"No, it's 'lo me da', wanna bet?"

Now, I've never seen this kid make a bet ever, but I'm pretty sure I'm good here.

"You got action. How much?"

He digs into his pockets, empties them, counts several wadded up bills, and ships it on me. Damn kid goes all-in. "Twelve bucks."

I'm laughing now. I'm like really? You're that sure? Mom's over there chuckling, saying he's in Spanish II, but damnit I used to live in Mexico and I actually have interacted with people that actually speak Spanish, but the kid just shipped it!

He comes out of the computer room like 5 minutes later and sheepishly hands over his twelve bucks. Busto. Those three Bud Lights I bought that night at the country bar were delicious :).

Thursday was Thanksgiving and awesome. I loooooooove my extended family.

Friday I left early to drive down to Fallbrook where Shelley's family lives. I got there and we went to see their horses down at the stables. Now, this was my first encounter with an English riding stable. I'm just going to say that where I come from the horses have way more fun. It was all very proper really, plus I got grilled by step-father in such a way that almost had me driving back to Vegas. It was one of those "oh you live in Vegas and 'gamble' for a living I know what you're like" kind of attitudes that drives me nuts. Things recovered nicely though and we talked shop for a good half hour that afternoon. His job is pretty fascinating as he's the manager for master-plan developments, from start to finish. He did Anthem here in Vegas for example. He was involved in the land swap with BLM that was a sick bluff to get the land all the way to the final property being built. We talked about the similarities of our professions, calculated risk, return on investment percentages, etc., and it was good dialogue. Yeah, so basically what these developers did was swap 100ish acres in Lake Tahoe for like 5,000 acres of desert south of Vegas. Long story short they made the Tahoe property seem very valuable to the BLM and the desert un-valuable. They make the swap, get Henderson to annex the land, re-zone for whatever it is they want, grant permits for whatever they want, and *poof* you have Las Vegas' version of Agrestic. The perfect utopian community. And a gold mine for the developers. And damn they got in and out at the right time, eh? I have a buddy who bought a place in there in 2006 for like 350k, and it's worth something like 225k now. Oops.

Anyways, we drove back to Vegas without hitting any traffic remarkably. Saturday was the start of the Bellagio Five Diamond with a $1500 NLHE. They dropped a bunch of the buy-ins last minute back to how they were in 2006 and I think I like it. It's a trend that's going to continue across the board imo and has to simply because there is less money in the poker economy these days. I dodged having to buy noodles by sucking out on Kathy Liebert in a silly spot, and honestly cannot remember how I busted sitting here Wednesday morning. Poker tournaments are such a blur.

The good news though was that I busted in time to make it to the Palms and see The Smashing Pumpkins. I was super stoked for this show. Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness was the first (two?) CD that I ever bought. Right along with The Presidents of the United States. She's lump, she's lump, she's lump, she might be dead. Lump lingered last in line for brains... hahaha that's gonna be stuck in your head all day now. I had a Duran Duran and Depeche Mode cassette in there before that, but it's still a special band for me. Shelley and I got there right on time, ran into Jon Turner and Tracey at the door, and before the show started I said, "I have a feeling that this is going to be one of those shows I remember for the rest of my life."

Well, it wasn't. I mean, I'll always be able to say I saw em or whatever, but, meh. It was unanimously disappointing.

I get a text while peeing during the show:

"are u standing next to me or is this your long lost twin brother? oh its zj btw."

While walking back I respond, "I'm moving now, I'm at the Pearl."

I go back to Shelley, bout fifteen heads back right in front of the bassist. Justin Bonomo taps my shoulder. LOL. He's standing next to Shelley on the other side of her, had been for the whole show pretty much. We ended up going to Naked Fish after, what seems to be turning into the online poker player's favorite sushi place, and we almost ran them out of fish. Good times.

Sunday was, well, Sunday. This one was quick and painless, getting me done nice and early so I could go to the bar and un-asplode my head. My truck would end up staying there that night, however, and here's why:

Gavin and I made a bet in Vancouver while drunk with these conditions. I must buy a breathalyzer. Upon delivery of said breathalyzer, 30 days from that point I cannot drive my truck without first passing a breathalyzer test. It doesn't matter if it's noon and I just woke up, I still gotta take one. I also have to video it. And, if I blow a .08 or higher, I cannot drive the truck. Or any other vehicle (obv in the spirit of the law). One thousand dollars.

He might win for the simple pain in the ass-ness of the bet. It's annoying to do every morning. Thing takes 60 seconds to count down and warm up, then I gotta blow, wait, all while being videoed knowing that I don't know what in the world Gav's going to do with this video. The whole not driving while over the legal limit is a pretty good habit to have and I'm glad to have the thing in the truck.

So, truck stayed there Sunday night. Monday I rode the skateboard back to the truck. My poor manager Katie. She e-mails me and says, "Give me a call when you get a chance so we can catch up." I decide that while rolling down the street on a skateboard, this is a good time for a business call. Makes sense to me.

Get the truck, come home, decide to play online, decide to play 10-20 PLO, and decide to quit after two hands where I got a guy to bluff off $1k to my top two pair blind vs. blind. I love PLO. And Euros. And Russians. And Brazilains. And especially northern Europeans. Man, I remember when somebody said "batshit insane crazy player" you automatically pictured that Vietnamese guy down at the Commerce. The Asians don't get enough love for being crazy anymore thanks to poker Stars and teh intranet. It sure is fun though, when contemplating some tough call, to hover your mouse over their avatar, see "Sao Paolo" or "Svinsk" and instantly start high fiving roommates on your way to the call button :).

Tournies went not so well that night, as I blew brains quickly once again, went back to the bar once again, and left my truck there once again. Turns out that gambling on over/unders at the bar with a breathalyzer is both fun and profitable.

Tuesday, woke up, won $ online, rode motorcycle to favorite Mexican place in Las Vegas, ate much Mexican, read some Watchmen, rode back, gave $ back + interest and late fees online, sucked at tourneys again, and was at the bar (again) by 8pm.

Same cabbie as the night before took me home, then the same cabbie took the rest of my roommates home. Turns out this cabbie is a local legend. The first night, my 0.14 ass is giving directions in the back seat. "And then turn right on Shamrock, and it's down..."

"Just past that big blue boat? That, eh, eh, piece of ship or whatever?"

Peace and good luck,


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