0 for 14: Uh Oh
June 13, 2021

A rough start to the WSOP, “men” in the ladies event, an awkward Walmart encounter, and next week’s poker schedule…



Contrary to what the title may indicate, I am really not sweating my atrocious start to the 2010 WSOP.  If you’re surprised, that makes two of us.  I came into the series having a halfway decent year on the live circuit, and a rare online semi-heater with a few deep runs in big tournaments.  I was feeling good and ready for some strong results to open the World Series.  I had a pretty piss poor WSOP last year, so I was anxious to get off to a good start.  At zero cashes in fourteen tournaments, that has obviously come and gone.  But I’m taking it very well, and there are a few things on my side.


My mental state is good and ready for the stresses of big money tournament poker.

I’m relatively secure financially, and I’ve been playing more cash poker for a more consistent income.  It’s very important to be able to look at the WSOP as an opportunity rather than a must-win.  There is just too much variance in these events to put the weight of final tables and bracelets on your shoulders.  I’ve also been really active lately, playing golf, basketball and racquetball, working out, and just hanging out with friends barbecuing around the pool.  Being happy in life helps to keep things in perspective when poker goes temporarily south.


I’m playing well

I didn’t play my best last year.  I gambled too much early in the smaller buy-in no limit events, and made a suspect play or two in the only tournaments I really had a chance in.  This year, I’m playing very well, and things just aren’t working yet.  I’ve mostly been card dead or unlucky early in the events.  In the few events I’ve mounted any sort of charge in, I’ve taken some pretty brutal beats to send me packin.  All I can do is play well and hope the rest falls into place.


Most of the events I’ve played so far have been on the smaller side.

I’m out $36,000 for the WSOP so far, which isn’t bad at all when you consider I’ve played 14 tournaments.  Fortunately, the bigger buy ins I’ll be playing are stacked more toward the back of the series.  I’ve only played one 10k and two 5ks so far, with the rest falling between 1k and 2.5k.  I may be halfway through the series in terms of tournament quantity, but I’m not even close using buy-ins as the measurement.


I’ll be playing the $2,500 6 handed no limit hold’em event tomorrow, and I like my chances in it.  I probably won’t win it, but I very well could.

A note on the WSOP ladies event

Apparently, there were a few “men” that played in the ladies event at the WSOP this year.  All of them should be embarrassed, though I have a feeling none of them is.  In just about every ladies event in poker, there is always some douche that plays in the name of civil rights and anti-discrimination.  On some level, you can understand where they are coming from: White men have had it extraordinarily tough in this country for a long time.  However, any reason a man gives for playing is generally super weak.  The ladies event isn’t there to segregate, or because the girls need their own event.  It’s there to give women an opportunity to come out and play against other women, in a setting that may be less intimidating for some than the usually 98% (minimum) male dominated fields.  No matter what the reason for having it, it works.  Over 1000 women came out to play and enjoy themselves.  Any “men” that feel the need to intrude upon this are just lame.  Shaun Deeb is one of two guys I know that played.  He even went so far as to dress up like a woman.  This may have been funny if he didn’t actually look just like a woman, which turned things rather creepy.  Unfortunately, he forgot the one accessory a real woman never would: a bra.  This left his man tits flapping around a bit too freely.  I don’t know if he lost a bet or won one, but even making this part of a bet is a queer thing to do.  I’ve also heard reports that there was some charitable cause for women used as a front for his participation.  That is like going and bothering a bunch of bums in the name of helping the homeless.  He seems like a good enough kid otherwise, but for this he’s a douche.  Ricky Fohrenback, a poker player I’ve spent time with traveling and would consider a friend, also played.  Ricky, you’re a douche too.


Grocery Shopping

My good friend, who had been living with me and acting as my assistant for a few months, left to go back to New York last week.  Not only do I no longer have anyone to play foosball with, but I had to do my own food shopping yesterday.  I know, I know – My life is sooooo hard.  So anyway, on my way through the health related isles to pick up some face wash, I stopped and moved my cart to allow a mother and her baby daughter to get by me.  They reminded me of my friend who has a 9 month old daughter and I was instantly happier upon seeing them.  I smiled at the baby girl first, then the mother.  While the baby seemed happy to see me and intrigued with my presence in her sphere as only a baby could be, the mother didn’t smile and hurriedly moved along.  As I contemplated the different reasons I could have been snubbed – she was in a rush, she didn’t like my beard, my smile is creepy – I turned and noticed something.  I was standing right next to the condoms.  Virtually every brand on the market was right in front of me as I smiled at this mother-daughter combo.  No wonder I didn’t get the return smile.  Rather than explain to her the unfortunate coincidence of our meeting, I thought it better to just let her go on her way and not creep her out any further.  Before I went on my way, I noticed one more thing – Magnum condoms are about 30% cheaper than the regular size.  Just one more advantage of having a big penis…



This week’s schedule:


Monday - $2,500 No Limit Hold’em (6-handed)

Monday - $1,500 Stud 8 or better

Tuesday - $2,500 Pot Limit Omaha

Wednesday - $1,500 No Limit Hold’em

Wednesday - $1,500 HORSE

Thursday - $5,000 No Limit Hold’em (6-handed)

Thursday - $2,500 Pot Limit Hold’em/Omaha

Friday - $10,000 No Limit Hold’em Heads Up Championship

Saturday - $1,000 No Limit Hold’em

Saturday - $3,000 HORSE

Sunday - $10,000 Pot Limit Hold’em Championship

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